I sat in Panera Saturday morning having just polished off my cinnamon crunch bagel with hazel nut cream cheese ready to write. There is so much to write this summer and I finally found a spot where I could turn on my writing playlist and pour out my heart on the page.
And then it happened.
Tears started to pool up in the corner of my eyes. Again.
“Surely I wouldn’t cry in Panera.” I had thought. But, there I was hiding behind my computer screen again.
Familiar tears. It seems like I have cried rivers over the past year for different reasons.
Fear.
Loss.
Joy.
Hope.
These have all been sources of my inability to keep my waterproof mascara in place. This week it had more to do with words written for moms. But, as I wrote I realized they were also for this mom, too. These hope words are dear to me. Dear to me I tell you. I’ve poured them out and re-written them so many times over the past three years. I almost feel like they are part of my family. They are both familiar and soul stirring. They are also new and healing. At times I read words I know I wrote months ago and they fall fresh on my heart. I‘ve prayed God would allow me to write words that move people, but lately it seems I’m the person being moved. I don’t know if that makes any sense, but it is the truth.
Truth. This is also what I need most now. I need to stand on truth from God’s Word and to hear him speak boldly to my heart. I need to swim in in fact. Guess what I’m working on this summer in addition to the edits on “Hope”: A book on Truth for moms. Funny how he just knows and planned it out accordingly. Every day a new truth for me to sink into and press my ear to his heart and say, “What about this one, Lord?” I’m being caught up in the wonder of it all.
And yes, I’m crying about that, too. But then again, you probably figured that to be the case.
xo,
Stacey
P.S. Thanks for your prayers and patience this summer. So many words are being tucked in other places for later days. If you want to keep up with me in the now, why not join us on Facebook? I love popping into that space to chat.
I’m always blessed when I stop by here. I have felt some of the same things, I’m sure for different reasons but I can understand.
I love your honesty.
Blessings,
Cyndi
Thank you sweet Cyndi. I’m so blessed by you!
Hi Stacey, I read this yesterday, but was travelling and for some reason could not comment using my phone. I have thought about you so much lately…both of us losing our dads. I know the sorrow and unexpected tears of which you write.
Please know that I continue to pray for you…almost daily.
By the way, I would love to know what is on your writing playlist!
Hugs & prayers~
Mary
Mary – I know you know. I appreciate you so much!
I love u, Stacey Thacker. I am convinced that He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it! And He is tucking away gems of truth in those hidden places (Psalm 51:6 right now… “Behold, You desire truth in the innermost being. And in the hidden part You will make me to know wisdom.” For He will give u treasures of darkness and hidden wealth of secret places, so that you may know that it is I, The Lord, the God of Israel, who calls you by name. He always has for me!
Just wanted to share what The Lord laid on my heart for u right now. When u r ready to “build a snowman” at Cheesecake or anywhere, let me know! I love u!
xo – thanks friend!