I have this friend named Emily who blogs over here. She started a link up called “Things I Learned” and it is by far one of my favorite posts to write. I haven’t been able to share my list since February, so my list is for Spring. I hope you will read some of the other posts from dear friends. Great with your Saturday Morning Coffee or while sitting by the pool.
1. He really does hold all things together (Colossians 1:17): A sweet friend of mine spoke this verse to me in the moments after my dad died. She also told me, “The only way through is through.” These are the two things I have continued to cling to. When I wanted to just keep sitting on the floor and not get up, “He holds me together” was what I heard. Every moment since, every tear, every memory—He just keeps holding me and I keep walking through it. My hand in His.
2. I am proud to be a blogger: I was deeply moved by the outpouring of love and support I’ve received over the past two months from this group of social media wonders. They have prayed, emailed, tweeted, texted, hugged virtually, sent flowers, given money, written notes, sent Starbucks—you name it. You really can have community online. I know, I’ve lived it.
ring from the justlovelythings’ shop :: etsy
3. Grief is not linear. There are certainly stages of grief but you don’t complete one and move on with a gold star. You really jump back and forth and sometimes experience stages at the same time. I’m learning to give myself time and understand the key is to keep moving forward.
4. Showing up is the gift. I had friends who drove for hours to just show up during the hardest week of my life. It matters. When you don’t have words to say, when you don’t have the answer to “Why” the greatest gift you can give is to simply show up.
5. 20 years of marriage deserves to be celebrated. My husband and I went to Disney without the kids. We rode rides, we ate Dole Whip, we watched the parade. It was marvelous.
6. If you put 1/2 tablespoon of coconut oil, cream, coffee, and stevia in your Nutribullet and blend it will be frothy and fabulous. I learned this from Holly on Facebook.
7. Sometimes God speaks and it is just for you. I’ve struggled these past few weeks with what to say. Do I share my heart? Do I tuck it inside for later? It is certainly OK as a writer to savor the words God speaks in your heart. Just because you write, doesn’t mean you have to write it all for all. It might be just for you or it might be for later. Just receive.
8. The best therapy may be 19th Century Fiction and a haircut. I read North and South this weekend by Elizabeth Gaskell Then I watched it on Netflix. The book is always better. I got lost for a couple of days, and it was glorious. I also got a much needed haircut and it was also glorious. I look and feel 10x’s lighter.
What did you learn this Spring? Love to chat in the comments!
Oh Stacey … I am so sorry for your loss and pray that God would lavish comfort and peace on you. And in the process, may your writing be a soul-healing outlet and a continuous source of healing rain …
Thank you Linda for your prayer!
I’m so sorry for your loss, but thank-you for writing about it and sharing what you have learned. I’m in the midst of a hard season and it’s not happy writing fodder but reading about a tiny bit of your journey is encouraging.
I also attest to the goodness of a good movie and a haircut during these hard times, mine was blond highlights and Saving Mr. Banks. =)
I’m so sorry for your loss. Losing a parent is one of the hardest things to go through… I’m praying God’s love, strength, and grace on you and your family.
So, so sorry for your loss, Stacey. I can imagine how true #3 is.
Love that you went to Disney sans kids and you’re making me want to revisit North and South. I loved the movie but had a hard time getting into the book. 🙂
Jenn – The last time I read it it stopped a couple of chapters in. But picked it back up last week and read it through in a few days. You should totally do it! Just skip until she meets Mr. Thornton!
I am so glad that you posted this list… I have been praying for you and I know that we are in circles that just barely overlap – but I remember seeing you post on facebook and praying for your family as it was all unfolding. I love your list and I love that it has been tested and tried and these are things you can testify to be true! Praying for you still…
On another note – I’m in need of a good haircut – AND a good fiction read… so thanks for the ‘permission’ to dive into both!
Thank you Karrilee – I appreciate your prayers!